Black Excellence: Haniyyah and Aaron Tillery

Welcome to “Black Excellence” at UIC.      

The Office of Student Success and Belonging, with Dr. Aisha El-Amin.       

Recording of Dr. Martin Luther King 00:09      

[Applause] Believe in yourself and believe that you’re somebody.      

Clips from 1995 movie “Panther” 00:17      

His intention is that we study and master a bunch of different things.     
Why are you here?       
Study and master a bunch of different things.     
I’m proud to introduce our new Minister of Information.     

Aisha El-Amin 00:26      

I’m Dr. Aisha El-Amin.      

Tariq El-Amin 00:29      

Welcome to “Black Excellence.”  

Haniyyah Tillery  00:34 

But when you look at your day and how you spend your time and what your communication is and what your actions are, does it reflect what you say matters the most in your life? 

Aisha El-Amin  00:46 

In this episode of the “Black Excellence” podcast, we speak with Haniyyah Tillery and Aaron Tillery as we unravel a true UIC Chance program love story. From their initial connection to the lasting impact UIC has had on their journey. Together, they share how UIC and the Chance program not only brought them together, but also empowered their relationship and aspirations to take flight. We begin today’s episode with how they first met. 

Haniyyah Tillery  01:21 

We met May of 2022. 

Aaron Tillery  01:27 

Yep, yeah. 

Haniyyah Tillery  01:29 

OK, so that would be the end of our freshman year while we were volunteering with the Chance program, with the James R. Jordan Foundation. And it would have been their end of the year, like, where they are, award the kids, and Michael Jordan was there, and all the things.  

And so, I just remember, I think it was Dr. Hayes who had called me, and she was just, like, “They need your help at Chance. Can you volunteer for me?” And I’m pretty sure that’s what happened. That’s why I ended up doing it, because I had a really close relationship with Dr. Hayes. She really helped me through my years of undergrad. And so, whatever she needed from me, I was like, of course.  

And so, I showed up, and I didn’t know a lot of the people from Chance. So, when I got there, I was just like, “Oh, hey, y’all, how y’all doing?” And everyone knew each other already, so apparently, they had their own little community situation, and I was not a part of it. I just had a really close relationship with Dr. Hayes, so I would always help her any way that I wanted, like, that she needed. So, but I wasn’t necessarily close with everyone there. And so Aaron was really nice to me and made sure that I felt welcomed. But that’s what I remember. 

Aaron Tillery  02:51 

Yeah. Just kind of a lead-up for my perspective as well. So, I was a part of Chance program towards the end of my first semester. So I ran into Mr. Parker, actually. And one of the first things, I didn’t even know he was with Chance, but he offered me some pizza. Now, one thing on me, Dr. El-Amin, I don’t turn on free food. I’ll take a pizza slice for free. So, he ended up, I ended up connecting with him, and once I met him, he brought me over to meet Miss Sawyer.  

And so Miss Sawyer was, like, one of the main people that’s been helping me, like, even now with the Chance program, I’m actually in her office as we speak, which is funny. But so her and Mr. Parker both informed me about the opportunity and, like, and I mentioned I knew some people going in, because most of them were during the study groups and things that I had at the end of the first semester. So I had a familiarity. But as far as meeting Haniyyah, what I remember is that one of the media, so they have, like, the media team. I’m not sure if it was ABC or NBC, but it’s one of the media people were, needed some help towards the camera, and so they had asked me to come help, because we were just trying to figure out some things to do, as far as the volunteers. And I was able to have a close enough shot when Michael Jordan came in, so I recorded on my phone. I’m a huge Michael Jordan fan. I texted my parents. They’re all super excited. They’re like get a photo of him. So I was determined. And so out of it, I had a nice, good video on my phone, at least I thought. And nobody else got a chance to record. And so after I got the clip, I think it was …  

Haniyyah Tillery  04:50 

Hold on. This is important. It’s not someone else got the chance to record, but my phone was broken. 

Aaron Tillery  04:56 

That’s right. Your phone was broken.  

Haniyyah Tillery  05:00 

That was someone’s fault. So I asked the person next to me, they, they, they did not let me,  they weren’t really right. I think they nicely just didn’t acknowledge my request. So I was just like, guys, I just, I really want to post it, like. And I ended up asking him, because, like he said, he had it on his phone, because he had it close up. It wasn’t that great. 

Aaron Tillery  05:28 

It wasn’t that great. I thought it was because I was, like, I’m the closest one to him. This is great. And one of the things that some of the staff were saying was that we all would get a photo with him. So I’m super geeked. I’m super excited. As soon as the event is over, they say that Michael Jordan left the building, and so we’re all hurt. But I’m like, one, again, one of the only people that had a video. So Haniyyah had asked me if I could send to her. And being like, like, at that moment, I was like, super nervous, because I was like, should I skip my number, or should I just, like, play it cool, play it cool. So I went the other way. I said, “Oh, you got Snapchat?” And that was, that was already, I’ll be honest, I look back on myself. I’m just like, man, why would you do that? 

Haniyyah Tillery  06:18 

I don’t remember exactly what my thought process was. I do know that I was just a little confused. I’m like, man, that’s why it was grainy, because you sent it to me on Snapchat.  

Aaron Tillery  06:28 

You know, and I had this cool scenario in my head. I was like, oh, it’s gonna be like, yeah, you know, take, take my number down and then that, that didn’t come out. The Snapchat came out. But, you know, I ended up sending it to her. And then, funny enough, shortly after that, about a week and a half later, Mr. Parker hit my line again about an opportunity to stay on campus the very first, like, summer program for CCSB. And so I’m, like, talking to my parents, because at the time, I was commuting, so I didn’t stay on campus at all first year.  

Aisha El-Amin  07:06 

What’s CCSB, for your listeners? 

Aaron Tillery  07:09 

That’s the Chancellor’s Committee on the Black Status, or Status of Blacks, right? Excuse me, I just flipped, flipped over the words. Yeah, but yes. So CCSB, again. So my parents were kind of nervous because I didn’t stay on campus, again, the first year. But they let me stay over the summer. And before that, there was a Zoom meeting to kind of inform everybody about what the expectations were. And I saw her name on the Zoom. I was just, like, there is no way that she’s in the same program. And yeah, after that, it was just like we were able to hang out every day, because it was a four-week program. We all were in the same, like, meetings. And then we all took different classes, but we all would just spend time together. It was about 20 of us. But me, Haniyyah and our good friend, Dorian, the three of us, we were just hanging out all the time, like nobody was, like, we weren’t doing nothing with all the three of us together. It was always just like a cool group to be around and stuff. And so, yeah. 

Haniyyah Tillery  08:16 

I didn’t think you liked me, though. I feel like that’s an important detail. In this month, we thought we didn’t like each other. Well, I kind of, but then I was talking to my friend who was my roommate during the time, Victoria, and she said, she was like, because I asked her. I was like, do you think he likes me? And she was like, no, no. So I was just, like, OK, well, I liked him, anyway. And I didn’t think about it again, for months.  

Aaron Tillery  09:01 

But the funny thing is, she, I asked her the same question. And then she was like, no, no, no, no. So I’m thinking … 

Aisha El-Amin 09:11 

Oh, Victoria, come on!  

Aaron Tillery  09:13 

So I’m like well, there’s that. I guess we just gonna remain good friends. So it was, it was definitely funny that she was, like, one of the people that was, like, kind of made us both clueless on what was really going on.  

But yeah, that was a really fun summer. We did, like, a lot of spontaneous stuff. Like, we had a whole talent show that she put together. And funny enough, and this is kind of going like far ahead, but one of the songs that I actually ended up playing was the song for our first dance at our wedding. “Beautiful Surprise” by India Arie. And she sung, she sung as well, which is, which is great. So, that was fun. And I wasn’t getting, like, four weeks, but it felt like I’d known her for like, a lifetime, just based on, like, the things that we would just do, like, randomly. So yeah, it was … 

Aisha El-Amin 10:11 

I don’t even know if you gonna remember this, Aaron. You were in Ace, and you were like, a peer success coach. And you were nervous about what you would get for Valentine’s Day for her. You’re getting everyone’s advice and so nervous. It was the absolute cutest thing ever.  

Aaron Tillery 10:40 

I was actually talking to Liz, maybe about a month ago about that, yeah. I was that was one of the scariest things in my life, because I just I knew that I wanted to do something very special. So, what I ended up doing was I actually wrote a song for her, and I played it for her. And then, yeah, we ended up going, I took her out to eat as well that day. But that was, like, the thing that I spent the most time on, because I was like, of course I want to do nice things like take her out to eat, but I want something that will last longer. So yeah, I wrote a song called “Love Letters” to her. 

Aisha El-Amin 11:20 

Oh, look at you. So, from dating to now marriage, what does it look like to balance your relationship amidst coursework and jobs and graduation? Because as students, you know, who find themselves in in a space where they have found the love of their lives and they’re balancing those things. Love to hear how you all are doing it and what advice you would give to other students. 

Haniyyah Tillery 11:51 

Funny enough, I was just talking to my coach at work, and she one of the things on our meeting outline for me to answer was, like, what is a personal priority for you? And I said that I’m doing everything in excellence without compromising what matters most. And that was one of the things that I even communicated during my interview. Because they asked you about work-life balance, because they really care about your work-life balance.  

And they said, like, how will you maintain work-life balance? And I said, well, I just, I’m recently married, and it’s important to me to make sure, like, when I go home, I’m able to be present. And so, I would just say, like, making what matters most matter the most in your actions is the most important thing. Because it’s really easy to say, well, these are the things that I care about the most. But when you look at your day and how you spend your time and what your communication is and what your actions are, does it reflect what you say matters the most in your life? And so, I, not doing this perfectly, but what I’m really working hard at is trying, when I go home, to not work and to be present and spend time in any way that I can. So, like, well, recently, I found a love for Tyler Perry movies, and he says we can’t watch them anymore. 

Aaron Tillery 13:27 

They’re just all the same to me. It’s the same ending. I can’t do it.  

Haniyyah Tillery 13:30 

But nonetheless, just finding things that we enjoy to do together. So that might be like, maybe yesterday, like, we were on Bible study together online, simple thing. But we were able to do it together, or watching TV or just ranting about things that we both in common dislike at the moment. All bonding moments. And I feel like having that in the day, just intentional time helps. Because life is busy, but having those moments that you say, you know, no matter what, I’m going to make sure that at least when I get home, that we are able to spend time together.  

Aisha El-Amin 14:12 

I need that reminder myself. Because I love that. Thank you for that. You have, yes, you’ve blessed me with that one. 

Aaron Tillery 14:18 

I would 100 percent echo that, as well. I think that was one of the main things that I think we both focus on as we started the school year was just, like, when we come home the only thing that we want to focus on is each other. And so, my schedule this year is a lot lighter, because that’s one of the things I wanted to prioritize, as well. But also, I go the extra mile in the morning to get things done throughout the day, so that when I get in the car, I don’t have to rush home to try to turn this assignment in, or, you know, a project or different things like that. But we can just have a general conversation about whatever the case is and not have to worry about those things. And so that’s kind of just what, again, I think, has helped us, especially transition from the summer, because we both, we’re just able to enjoy that a little bit more. But just kind of, again, putting those priorities first of like, school is an important thing, work is important, but this is something that will be much longer than possibly these stints, of course. Like I said, I graduate next year. She just started working here. But we want our marriage to be something that’s a lifetime. So, it’s the small things like that, putting that first, that I think will help benefit.  

Aisha El-Amin 15:41 

Y’all got a whole lot of wisdom. I’m just saying, like, I’m 25 years in, and I’m like, OK, yeah, that, like, it took me awhile learn some of that. So, look, I love you sharing that wisdom.  

When you think about, so I know that the Chance program connected you all. What else did it do for you all in that space? Were there other things that impacted you with your involvement, with the Chance program, that you could share? 

Aaron Tillery 16:11 

So, other than, of course, finding my wife, which is, it’s so funny to say, it’s like, my goodness. But yeah, other than, you know, meeting her, just overall, I feel like the program has really shaped me into being a leader that I desire to be, and that others believe that I am. Which is very, you know, very impactful, or, like, very exciting for me to hear, very grateful for it. But yeah, just overall, the things that I’ve been able to grow in, especially when it comes to work. I have through this program been able to work with multiple different accounting firms and companies throughout the summer, and even been extended for part-time roles during the school year. And just because of a simple conversation of, hey, you want a free slice of pizza? I think that’s something that always blows my mind, is that I never looked at the opportunities that I have now to turn out that way. I thought it would be something, of course, of just staying in school, keeping my head down and, you know, focusing mainly on the studies. But it’s about also reaching out and connecting and networking that, through Chance, has helped me grow in that area.  

And so, I’ve been very blessed and fortunate to have opportunities for work. I feel like I’ve met my lifelong friends here as well. Other people that I get to call auntie and uncle, you know, many other people also came to our wedding because of that. But I think that’s just what I would say Chance has been for me. 

Haniyyah Tillery 17:58 

I feel like the biggest impact that it’s had on my college career and onward was relationships. It showed me the importance of having a home base and building relationships, and how that can really come through for you when you need something or when you’re interested in something.  

So, a huge example of that was the support I had in starting my organization my freshman year. Dr. Hayes was my advisor for the organization. But when I got the idea, I actually went to Mr. Parker first. And I laughed, because I just remember vividly that conversation of him just looking at me like, what is this? Like, what is this idea?  

And I told him, I was like, look, I already got the plan. I already, like, this is the organization. This is what we gotta, like, I had everything, like, written out to where he thought I already had, like, the organization set up. He thought I had people, it existed. Mind you, it was an idea that I had two days ago. But he had enough faith in me, or at least enough patience to say, you know what, I’m gonna I’m gonna try to help her. And that’s how I ended up getting involved with the summer program to begin with, because he was like, oh, I have an opportunity that would be good for you. You can meet other student leaders. I know some kids that are coming are the president of this organization, this organization. I know what you want to do is bridge the organizations. So that actually was super helpful. And I ended up building so many, like, cross-campus relationships through that sort of exposure and getting used to, like, working with other leaders, not just student leaders, but also, you know, professors, administrators, all types of things. And so, it really helped me in that, yeah.  

Aisha El-Amin 20:00 

Shout out your organization, though.  

Haniyyah Tillery 22:11 

Ah, yes, I have a Black student coalition. That was, that was great. That was a great experience.  

And then also, like, from doing it and having that role on campus, I was able to represent the university in different ways as well. And so, all that to say being connected with people who cared enough, right, to say, I’m going to help you. I’m going to at least, I’m going to send the email. I’m going to invite you into this. I’m going to put your name in for that. That goes so far. 

And when I think about what that means for my career as an educator, that’s what I do for these kids. And so, I teach, I’m a diverse learning teacher. So I have a smaller group of students that I teach from each grade. But then I’ll have, like, kids that I, they aren’t nowhere near in my class. And they saw me, “Hey, Miss T, so I’m gonna email you about the so-and-so opportunity.” I just, like, forgot we had that conversation. Because anytime I have the opportunity, I’m going to talk to a young person and say, hey, what are you interested in? And then, how can I help you? Like, do you know what opportunities are out there? Did you know that you can be volunteering to work in the health care, you know, industry now, like you can go and volunteer at a hospital right now? If you want to start your business, you can start it right now. You know, like, you can do these things. And let me help you. So that, people doing that for me, now I get to help other kids. And this is the coolest thing ever. 

Aisha El-Amin 21:38 

Oh, my gosh. You all, look, my jaws are starting to hurt because. So, as we close out, I want to end with one question to each of you. If you could go back, before you started a UIC, and offer yourself some great advice, what would that advice be?  

Aaron Tillery 22:05 

You’re gonna have to go first. I gotta think this one through. 

Haniyyah Tillery 22:11 

A fantastic question. I would say the advice that I would give to myself, I would tell myself something that no one told me during my four years. So, to maximize that opportunity, it would be listen and learn from others in everything that you do. That goes into when you are a leader, learn from those that you’re leading, listen to them. Don’t take offense when they have correction for you. When it comes to your, it doesn’t matter who it is, we’re a bit more receptive to if a professor corrected us, right? We’re paying y’all to do that. But when it comes to peers or those that you don’t immediately think to take heed to what it is that they’re saying, we want to shut our ears, or we might think we know more. I feel like 18-year-olds think they are the most intelligent people on Earth somehow. So I would tell myself to listen and take every opportunity to learn. Because I feel like once I made that switch of, actually, there’s really something valuable for me to gain from just humbling myself and receiving. It makes life a little bit less stressful, because now I’m not bearing the weight of having to know everything. And then you are, it’s easy to build relationships as well, because people feel heard and valued. So that would be …  

Aisha El-Amin 23:40 

That is some, that is some sage advice. All right, close us out with the with this advice you’re giving yourself. 

Aaron Tillery 23:48 

Yeah, I would say, so, 17-year-old me, I would tell him to be strong and be confident in yourself and, like, in your voice. Because this transition that I’ve been able to slowly but surely, like, grow into has been something that I didn’t really have enough confidence in coming in. I was afraid about every little thing, a midterm, talk to my professor, even a TA just because of the idea of failure.  

But after going through some different, you know, semesters or different journeys throughout this college experience of some ups and downs, I realized that the best thing I could do is be vocal and to be confident. Not coming around professors timid, but truly, if I’m stuck on something, or even if I feel like I have the correct answer and am able to showcase it, going and doing that. Because seeing that now has led me to these rooms and these areas that I’ve been in. I know we have to close very quickly. But I was able to be the vice president of the National Society of Black Engineers, mainly because people saw my ability to be vocal and to share with them the knowledge that even people on the E board didn’t know. So they unanimously voted me in as vice president because they saw that I’m able to really be confident and to be vocal in these areas. And so, I would say definitely that is something I wish I had more of coming in. 

Aisha El-Amin 25:33 

Mm, well, you got it now. And it is, it is amazing the young people that you all are and the things that you’ve already done. I am in awe. Thank you for your time with me. It’s an honor to be part of you all’s journey and to share that journey and scream it from the mountaintops, because you all are an inspiration. So keep doing the things that you’re doing, please.  

Haniyyah Tillery  25:57 

Thank you so much. Thank you so much, you do, because I don’t know all the responsibilities you have. 

Aaron Tillery 26:06 

Right, absolutely.  

Haniyyah Tillery 26:07 

You know, these young people have what they need to thrive and have the connections and the resources and all of the things that make the college experience what you want it to be. So I appreciate the work that you do, that much of probably goes unseen, so I have no clue. But I’m thankful because I know that it has, it has blessed me. 

Aisha El-Amin 26:33 

You know what? I’m hugging y’all across the screen.  

Announcer 26:41